I was on the bus thinking about Harry Potter tonight and I remembered the part where the Dementors all show up at the Quidditch game, and I remembered how they were all looking up at Harry, and I wondered why they would all be staring at him, and then I realized that it’s because he has two souls in him.
On this note, wouldn’t that also be a reason why Harry would have had a more negative reaction than his friends (even Ginny)? He was hearing his mother’s voice as she was protecting him, which in itself was his worst memory. but the Dementors were also forcing the piece of Voldemort to relive its worst memory as well… The memory of being ripped apart by the curse that backfired. No wonder Harry passed out so often.
I literally never thought about that.
HOLY
Oh FUCKING HELL, you just made me realize that it wasn’t Harry’s memory that was his father telling Lily to take Harry and run, and it wasn’t Harry’s memory of Lily screaming.
Here I was, just eating a cup of applesauce under the 14-year-long assumption that the reason a small infant was able to remember something was because this was a fictional world of magic, but no, now this entirely reasonable and somewhat less terrifying bubble has burst and I’m never going to recapture that innocence.
I’m going to fucking bed.
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Calculus
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Algebra
Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Theorem
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Analysis
Harry Potter and the Order of Operations
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Statistician
Harry Potter and the Deathly Algorithms
OH MY FUCKING GOD
AND THE ORDER OF OPERATIONS
I’m in Dumbledores math club…
More like Harry Hypotternuse.
You’re a mathemagician, Harry.
Because I sincerely believe that even if Dumbledore could leave baby Harry at the doorstep for a night- the Mcgonagall I know would’ve stayed behind, crying silent tears over the loss of her two students, and holding the infant in her arms.
In the morning when milkman arrived, he was rather amused by seeing a tabby cat sitting by a small bundle..
why am i like this guys
So I saw someone mention that Tom was regularly referred to as ‘handsome’ by Harry in HBP, and I decided to check how accurate that was.
And they’re absolutely right. Harry can’t seem to make a trip into the pensieve without thinking of Tom as handsome.
Chapter 13: The Secret Riddle
Chapter 17: A Sluggish Memory
Chapter 20: Lord Voldemort’s Request
Chapter 23: Horcruxes
To put this into perspective, the word handsome is used 12 times by Harry to describe people. Harry uses it 4 times to describe people who aren’t Tom, and once to describe Tom’s father.
But he uses it 7 times to describe Tom.
He also refers to Tom as handsome once in DH.
Chapter 19: The Silver Doe
And while I’m at it, lets examine Tom regarding Harry ‘hungrily’ in CoS.
Chapter 17: The Heir of Slytherin
Tomarry/Harrymort.
It’s almost Canon.
If you don’t want me to ship it, don’t make it so obvious there’s pining going on (or at the very least, attraction/possessiveness), gdi. This is why I think people who insist it’s breaking canon to make Harry bisexual are ridiculous. Especially considering he describes other men in much more appealing fashion than women. Including Ginny |D
@thelastnero @greenmornings Thought you guys might appreciate this.
Since I’m unable to see something without coming up with a cracky AU, my mind totally went to an AU where Harry still found Voldemort weirdly hot after his resurrection. Harry’s horrified at first, since it was bad enough finding mini Voldemort hot, but this?? His dick doesn’t seem to care tho so Harry just goes back to compartmentalizing things really well and trying not to think about it too much.
And then the ministry battle happens in fifth year and Voldemort appears, to which an angry Harry yells, “How dare you show your handsome face in the ministry!”
His anger fizzles right out into embarrassment when he realizes what exactly he said, but the forces of the universe refuse to align and make time go back just a few seconds.
Voldemort stops whatever speech he was about to go into. Sirius kind of wants to faint and manages out a weak, “What.”
Bellatrix just nods happily. “Isn’t he? At least you appreciate proper beauty.”
Harry tries to die for having something in common with Bellatrix, but sadly no one’s trying to shoot a killing curse at him.
“Potter,” Voldemort hisses, which Harry also finds totally un-hot. “You’re a bit young for me, but if I haven’t managed to kill you in a few years, seek me out.”
“Never,” Harry replies, very valiantly.
Voldemort’s face does a shifty thing that Harry recognizes as the motion to raise an eyebrow, though there aren’t any brows over Voldemort’s creepy red eyes. Also not hot.
“…is seventeen too young for you?”
I have this great image in my head of an AU where during the first task of the Triwizard Tournament, one the Horntail’s eggs hatches and somehow the baby dragon gets super attached to Harry. And for the rest of the series there’s this adorable baby dragon following him around.
Harry carries her in his arms like a baby when she gets tired. They hiss in parseltongue to each other. She gets scared by a little beetle flying around and accidentally roasts it alive. The other schools are livid bc it’s even more cheating from Hogwarts, but no one is really prepared to piss off a baby dragon that sees Harry Potter as her parent. Draco takes one look at her and sees the light. Suddenly all the Potter Stinks badges are gone. Wormtail doesn’t even get a curse out before she flies at his face and bites him. Harry introduces her to Sirius and her favorite thing is cuddling up with Padfoot. Harry sees her as the most adorable thing ever but everyone else is so very aware of the fact that there’s this nigh invulnerable beast stalking behind the Boy Who Lived that is just waiting for them to become a threat.
Muggle World: We’re sorry, Harry, you won’t get to compete in the contest. There must’ve been a glitch in our systems. You weren’t supposed to be in the draw at all, you’re too young.
Wizard World: Send this child to the death games! The goblet has spoken!
the Wizard World is a lawless hellscape
Harry James Potter, describing a girl
Luna: odd, blonde, wears strange stuff.
Fleur (Canonically the hottest girl around, like): French, kinda hot but yeah whatever.
Cho: she cries.
Ginny (future wife!!!11!): Quidditch, freakles, kinda scary.
Harry James Potter, describing a guy
Cedric: dark hair, bright eyes, really pretty.
Sirius: Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. He’s awesome, I’m trembling. Beautiful.
Tom Riddle: Beautiful, pale, dark hair.
Draco Malfoy: literally sparkles in the sunlight. What is Draco up to? Where’s Draco? Draco, Draco, Draco, Draco. Pointy features. Really pale. Okay, but Draco, Draco, Draco?
How am I supposed to believe that Harry Potter is an heterosexual man?
I’ve probably re blogged this before but it’s worth another for the accuracy. 😂😂
